I don’t believe there are many of us over the age of 25 who have not suffered some heartache of some kind. Goodness… it’s so painful, to have your heart shattered to a thousand pieces after trusting someone with that heart and love… it takes time to put that heart back together again and it will always leave scar tissue.
There is no pain like heartache. There is no instant cure, but over time, it does heal. You just have to give yourself time.
There are some of us that the heartache is far too much to ever put ourselves in that position again and it is those of us that are closed to love.
This is your own way of protecting yourself from being hurt again and if this is what you want and how you want to live your life, no one can tell you otherwise, there is nothing wrong in that. But if you want love and allow yourself protection to dictate how you react, then this can take the self-protection too far and you can do yourself out of love.
Firstly, you must recognise that you are closed to love.
Some of us will know as we will simply acknowledge it and make that conscious choice never to enter the waters of love again. I stress, that is fine! This post is for those that want love but are not aware they are closed to it. Part 2 will give some tips on how to become more open to loving again.
If you are holding onto a past relationship, you will not be open to new love. Most of us can only ever focus on one person at a time and when we love, we love wholly. If you are holding onto an ex, whether to rekindle or you are just holding onto them, this will prevent you from loving another. You must let go of them.
Holding onto an ex can also be harbouring feelings of anger, resentment or blame. Holding onto these negative feelings means you are focusing on your past. Looking over your shoulder to your past means you cannot look forward to the future. Let them go.
If you push your emotions aside… We all have emotions that can be good, some are challenging, but if you suppress your emotions, of course this will cause a block in your heart chakra and these blockages, again, mean that you are not able to open yourself to love.
Are you neglecting yourself and putting everyone else’s needs above your own? This means you do not have to focus on your own area of love. Have you always done this as you felt from early on in life that your needs were not as important as others?
Do you push people away? Do you isolate yourself from others and live a more solitary life? Do you do this and then expect love to find you and knock at your door? And when it doesn’t … wonder what you are doing wrong? It is a form of self-sabotage.
When you find someone do you look for fault and expect them to not meet your expectations? Are you setting things up to fail?
If you recognise any of these then please consider: are you closed to love? If you are unhappy with that, then now is the time to do something about it and allow yourself to love again without fear.
We all know that phrase ‘with great love there is great pain’, well there will be for one party, but that pain is worth it if you want to feel the love. Those that know me, know that I talk from experience here. I share that so you know I am not just spouting some rubbish without experiencing it myself.
Just take a few moments to ponder on these points raised.
Hugs,
Shelly x
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