Guest Speaker

Conceptual Personal Boundaries in Relationships

Setting conceptual or mental boundaries in relationships or in general interactions can be described as setting ground rules or limits and guidelines defined by you that is unique to you because we all have our own individual comfort zones and issues or problems. It can be used to protect you and prevent others mistreating you. There are different types of personal boundaries concerning: time, emotional (or internal), sexual, physical (or external) to mention a few.  For example, everyone has a physical distance; comfort zone or space around them which varies for some people, and if anyone gets too close then it may feel uncomfortable to us, perhaps like when travelling on a crowded train during rush hour!

Having boundaries can be a challenge for some people who may be ‘people-pleasers’ or are not assertive enough and have a problem saying “no” to others for various reasons. Perhaps because they do not have a sense of themselves; who they are, their rights, what they find acceptable, what’s okay and what’s not okay. Their self-esteem could be low, or they give power over their own feelings to how others feel and other outside influences.

Therefore taking responsibility; being aware of your feelings, learning to identify or expressing your feelings about situations, and setting boundaries for yourself is important to protect you and prevent anyone taking advantage. An emotional boundary for example helps in meeting your own needs, without someone else taking away your right to meet or satisfy your own needs for yourself.  Boundaries can help to avoid losing your identity/individuality in a relationship; it provides a sense of self-empowerment instead of passivity, for example, relying on others to take care of your needs and them perhaps taking more care of their own! Boundaries can be a good gauge to assess the balance between what you will tolerate or will do for yourself (being assertive), or what someone else is expected to do for you or not do to you.

Earth Angel

Love & light xxx

 

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